i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
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