Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Randomize
