I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
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