Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
he's gonorrhea incarnate
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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