very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Randomize
