At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
Randomize
