So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
