I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
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