so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
We left an ass print on the piano.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
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