The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
tell me about the fingering
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