I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
