we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
