Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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