I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
Randomize
