is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
