Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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