I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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