The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
