just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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