This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
