ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
