i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Randomize
