I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Randomize
