I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
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