Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Randomize
