If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
