Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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