They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Randomize