How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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