What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Randomize
