Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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