Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I think I just shit out all my problems.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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