similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
