just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize