I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
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