I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Randomize
