please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
