Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
