he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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