covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
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