Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
