Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
