So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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