that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
My vagina is officially offended.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
