It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
