i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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