piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
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