It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Randomize
