none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
