thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
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